Monday, October 31, 2005

Fear of Being a Clone

Oneness can be expressed in two ways: from a place of Love or a place of fear. Oneness from a place of love is recognising a loving presence in all that makes us all want to be happy, free and enjoy life.

When oneness is expressed from a place of fear, it's about wanting to control through a dominant idea or belief. Then you find people wanting everyone to follow the same master, or the same doctrine. Baa Baa!

This morning at the local tube station I noticed a man pushing a baby in a buggy. I let him through the doors. I asked the cashier for a week's bus pass. While I was waiting for my pass I heard the man asking for the same. Then I went to catch my bus. There are several buses that stop at that station. When my bus arrived I saw the same man trying to get on the same bus.

I've noticed that I tend to meet people who have got similar goals, at least in that moment. Take one day last week I was thinking of naturists and how in the documentaries I've seen about naturism, you never see attractive people with fit bodies. A day or so later while I was waiting for a bus I got chatting to this woman. Don't ask me how the conversation moved on to naturism but it did. The woman said there never seems to be attractive people in naturists beaches. Hehehe!

Does oneness mean we are all going to be doing the same thing and thinking the same thoughts? Of course not. While I shared similar goals with the man I saw this morning, what we were actually sharing was the one Love, which manifested as bus passes. We parted company when I got off the bus to express the one Love in my own way; and he stayed on the bus to express the one Love in his own way.

To those who are fearful of being a clone, here's a reminder. Think of how many people who wish to experience falling in love? I don't hear people saying "Oooh, I'm scared that if I fall in love, I'll be like everyone else." The problem is people have so bought into the one idea of how love should be that they end up acting like clones. But if we are to remember that the One Love that is in you is in your partner, there will be no need to control anyone. You enjoy being love in whatever way you choose to express love.

Another reminder. Many people wish to have kids. Does wanting to experience having a family mean you're being a clone? Of course not. I am glad my mother chose to play the game of parenting, her way of expressing the one Love. It's not a game I intend to play but I respect those who want to. Writing is my way of raising a family.

Oneness is not about being a clone. Oneness is about being the One in one's unique way.

Loving you all,

Is There a Devil?

Is there such a thing as the devil, satan or the ego?
Does the One have an adversary?

First of all let me just define what I mean by the One. The One is a presence that is beyond concepts and ideas, an Impersonal Love and Goodness, that is everywhere present. The One is the substance of all, the creative intelligence in all.

The earth (and other realities like earth) is like a game. The object of the game is to realise there is only One taking on the many forms. To make the game more challenging, every move you make there is an antagonist trying to distract you from your objective.

Thus, the devil, (satan or the ego) is any thought, word or deed that distracts you from realising there is only One.

This game has been going on for eternity and continues in other realities. If you live without realising your true purpose, when you pass away from this realm you end up in another game with further distractions, until you realise the truth of the One.

One way the devil distracts us is through the belief that food is both good and bad for you. Foods that are bad for you seem to attack you. Another illusion. Since there is only One in all, it shouldn't matter anyway what one eats or drinks.

Yesterday I decided to prepare a lovely meal. I haven't cooked in ages. As I was chopping the onions my eyes started to sting. Aha, another distraction. I was having none of that. I said, "You can't fool me onion. I know the One in me is the same One in you." The stinging instantly stopped.

What about the tendency for people to be critical of other people. You are forgetting that the One in you is the same One in the other you are judging. All it takes is to realise there is only One and the desire to judge is removed.

Religion is meant to teach people about the One yet they only succeed in creating further divisions. There are religions who teach there is only one way to God. If they only realised that the One in one religion is the same One in all religions, cults and groups.

Another distraction tool the devil uses is pain and suffering. Have you noticed that when you have pain it is usually a part (or parts of the body) that hurts? You end up focusing on that part that hurts and believe that part has its own mind which is attacking you. Why would the One attack itself? To reverse the effect just think that there is only the One Love in all.

I could list hundreds of examples about how the devil distracts one but I'd rather spend my time exalting the One.

The One has no opposites. Whatever appears as an adversary is the devil, an illusion, whose purpose is to distract you from knowing the truth of the One behind all forms.

Only One Exists.

Game Over!

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Hello Love

When you think about someone you know do you think about how wonderful he or she is or do you see the other as a combination of "good" and "bad" according to your standards?

You say loving someone means accepting someone "warts and all" but is this possible? Are you able to see more of the other and not let your views be distorted by someone's "warts?"

Take someone like Hitler who has a bad press. Surely Hitler had his moments of kindness and was loving? Are you able to see beyond his actions?

If you can go beyond someone's behaviour and see him clearly, there is nothing there but good intentions. Everyone is innately good.

The way I see it, why bother trying to see beyond someone's behaviour or beliefs? Why not just go to the Source or essence. Essence is free of all beliefs, it is pure goodness, it is Love.

In the UK some people use the word "love" as an endearment for everyone they meet whether they are friends, family or strangers. People say "Hello love!" or "You're alright, love?" I guess referring to everyone as Love is acknowledging that in essence we are all the One Love.

Bye Love.


What is Infinity?

Can't touch this
Can't touch this (oh-oh oh oh oh-oh-oh)
My-my-my-my music hits me so hard makes me say oh my Lord
Thank you for blessing me with a mind to rhyme and two hyped feet
Feels good when you know you're down
A super dope homeboy from the Oaktown
And I'm known as such
And this is a beat uh u can't touch
I told you homeboy can't touch this
Yeah that's how we're livin' and you know can't touch this
Look in my eyes man can't touch this
You know let me bust the funky lyrics
MC Hammer

I've been thinking about what infinity really means.

Does infinity mean

Ever expanding?

Is infinity something that stays the same no matter what?

Let's look at an example of Infinity as Infinite Joy, as in this blog's title. By this I mean never-ending, ever expanding (increasing), and unlimited joy.

We tend to think of forms as expanding, what about the reverse? Since nothing ever ceases to exist, a form can get smaller and smaller; ever decreasing and never-ending.

There is Infinity in an abstract sense. Thus, Infinite Joy stays the same no matter what.

Does this mean Infinity as something that is expanding or decreasing is experiential, while Infinity as an abstract concept stays the same whether one has the experience or not?

Hmmm! Good question.

The concept of unlimited expansion or contraction has to be a human concept not that of the One/Source.

I see the One as Infinity in the abstract sense as being the same no matter what. This challenges the notion that the One needs everyone to experience life. Love is Love no matter what we do, think or believe.

It is wonderfully freeing to realise that no matter how many experiences you have had, you "can't touch this." There is always Infinity waiting to be experienced in every moment.

Infinity is the One.
The One is the same forever.


See: Mc Hammer - Can't Touch This video

Poignant Thought of the Day

This is for my friend who is mad about chess.

Q: How many chess players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Don't know, I'll have to check mate.




A: Do you realise you say "sorry" all the time?
B: Sorry, I didn't realise.
A: You've done it again.
B: I apologise.
A: And again.
B: Did I say "sorry"? I didn't mean to.
A: If you say so.
B: Sorry I'm being such a pain in the neck.
A: Forget it.
B: I'll try to remember not to say "sorry" in future, OK?
A: You are a lost cause!
B: Sorry!


Shock Horror!

I seem to be losing my appetite. After going without food for a whole day yesterday, I had a sandwich late at night. I didn't even think about chocolate or Weetabix.

It was then I had the most awful thought that shook me to the core of my being. What if I wake up one day and have no more desire for chocolate or Weetabix? What would life be like? Who would I be? Shock horror!

Father, I beseech thee to remove these wicked thoughts from my mind!


Thursday, October 27, 2005


I told my mother while she was away I was going to fast. She looked at me as if I was crazy. I knew what she was thinking, I'm skin and bones enough as it is, why would I need to fast? When I said I was going to fast I didn't know what I meant, the words just popped out, but I knew they meant something.

For the last two weeks I've been on a fast. No, I haven't been starving myself. I have been fasting from the news. I've been living in a reality where I only watch stuff I enjoy such as sci-fi series or been in meditation. I haven't been on the Internet much either. Has my life changed without the news? Nope. Am I a better person? Nope. I am the same peaceful Enocia.

Fasting from the news and other media is like choosing not to read a book many people are raving on about; or staying away from a film everyone is going crazy about.

Fasting is good. It shows me that no matter what is going on I am always the same. So I can take stuff or leave stuff; same difference.

I'm starving. I wonder what's going on in the world? (grin)


What Blesses One Blesses All

Some months back they showed the sci-fi series, Dr Who, on television. I soooo wanted to watch the whole series, but I was never home on time to watch them. They usually repeated the same episode later on another channel but I would either forget to watch it, or my mother and I would be watching something else when the repeat was on. I only saw 3 episodes in the end.

Well guess what? They've decided to show the whole series this week. I get to catch up on all the episodes I missed out on. It's funny how they are showing them now. My mother is away on holidays right now, due next week. She's not into sci-fi. Seems I got my wish fulfilled which I can enjoy all alone while my mother is having fun where she is. What blesses me, blesses my mother, and all Dr Who fans.

A while back my mother hired a gardener to trim the hedges in front of the house. The gardener put the weeds in a black bag. For some reason, the dustbin men don't like taking this kind of rubbish, even when they've been put in a refuse bag and on top of the wheelie bin. I was going to test them to see whether they would remove the bag but the rubbish was too heavy for me to lift and it was way too much effort. I figured I'd let the leaves dry up for another week, put the rubbish in another black bag, thus disguising the rubbish. In the meantime, I also put out a request to the Universe to remove the rubbish. This morning I noticed a card from the local council notifying local residents that all rubbish the dust men don't usually collect will be collected on Sunday. Yippee! What blesses me blesses everyone in the neighbourhood.

No matter what exciting chores need doing, I NEVER forget there is only One.


The Myth of Personal Power

Imagine you are all alone with your best friend who happens to be of the opposite sex. There are no other humans. You see everything the same way, and you get on like a house on fire. There is no concept of you and him, you are simply an "us." You are of one mind though you are not consciously aware of this concept. As you are all alone, there is no one for you to compare yourself against, therefore, the concept of beauty doesn't exist. You simply accept who you are and your partner as who he is. You accept nature with its diversity for what it is. You have no concept of lack; everything you need is always there in abundance. There is no sense of power, nor is there a sense of love. There is only a presence that is your life. You are in bliss land.

One day your partner suggests he would like to explore another part of where you are. You are happy for him to do this. You decide you will also explore another part of the land. As soon as your partner is gone you start feeling a sense of loss. You interpret the space between you as a separation. For the first time you experience yourself as a separate "I". You believe you are all alone, an individual with your own thoughts.

Your sense of separation leads you to believe nature is also separate from you. You feel you need some sense of control over what is apart from you. Because you feel you need to have control over something, you attract circumstances which leads you to want to take control. Nature even turns against you. The world is no longer blissful but quite scary. You are now missing your partner and believe his presence will help allay some of your fears. You start thinking of ways you could get him to return to you. Your eyes are now open to the concept of personal power. You also feel as if you need your partner there to care for you. You now experience love as in the ability to love someone that is apart from you and being loved in return.

Oddly enough, your partner is going through similar anxieties because, as you are of one mind, your fears are also shared. Your partner is also thinking he is all alone and has his own power. He is also seeing the world as a threatening place.

After some time you are reunited. However, you are no longer the harmonious couple you used to be. You are two individuals with separate powers fighting to take control over one another and the world around you. You are no longer being but surviving.

The truth is there is only one. It doesn't matter whether someone is a billion light years away from you, you are always one. What about the concept of "you experience what you believe?" if you believe there are individual minds, will you experience that as your reality? Yes. If you believe you have your own mind then you will live in an adversarial reality. However, your belief will not change the immutable truth that there is only One.

When you know there is only one, someone could be in the next galaxy and you will still feel close. But when you are of the belief in many minds, you will feel great loss when someone is not physically close to you.

One who knows there is only one is aware there is no personal power, there is only power. One who believes in different minds thinks he has his own personal power which he can use to give himself an advantage over his illusory opponent.

One who knows there is only one is aware that what blesses one blesses all. One who believes in different minds thinks what blesses one only applies to the one and not others.

Oneness of mind doesn't mean sameness? If that were the case everything in nature would look the same. Diversity is intrinsically part of the One, the way the One experiences Self. Thus, we are all unique in our nature, yet, there is only One of us.

If you wish to live in a fairy tale, personal power is a useful belief to have. If you wish to live in Reality, personal power is a myth. Only One Exists.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Wow! It's Magic!

While I've been browsing the Internet, I've been chatting to a young boy, aged 8, sitting beside me who is playing games on the Internet. He is mad about WWE wrestling. He asks me if I watch it. I tell him I have watched a few and name the Rock as someone I've seen. My young friend asks me if I am into karate. I tell him I don't practise Karate but I have watched Bruce Lee films. We also chat about the film, Spider Man, which I only saw last week. My friend shows me some of his favourite computer games on the Internet.

It's my turn to show him how clever I am at touch typing. I ask him to think of any word and I am going to type it without looking at the keyboard. Just to make it more impressive, I look away from the screen while typing.

"How did you do that?" he says.
"It's easy."
"Do it again," he says.

He gives me different words, some easy, some difficult, and I type them all without looking at the keyboard. You should see his eyes. He thinks it's magic. I tell him one day he'll be able to do it.

"Do you swim?" I ask him.
"Well, touch-typing is like swimming. You don't think about it, you just do it."

Says she who doesn't swim but can doggie-paddle. Oh well, he gets the picture anyway.

It's funny how I think it's magical for an eight year old to be so familiar with computers. When I was eight, I couldn't even imagine one let alone. It's all magic!

This magician is about to turn herself into a cloud of smoke.

Poof! I'm gone!


Good Intentions

I know you still see me
As your little sister
You want to see safe and well.
Though our methods differ,
And our paths diverge,
Know that I always feel
Your good intentions for me.
It's so wonderful to know
You are always there.
Thank you dear brother for caring.

I love you.

Little Sis

On Boredom

There is a website called NationStates where I go to play. At this website you can create your own nation, enact laws and communicate with like-minded leaders of nations. Yesterday I sent a message that I was bored and I needed some action. What I was actually saying was I was sick of being a dictator who doesn't care about her people. I decided to create a new nation that is all sweetness and light. How long that is going to keep me entertained is anybody's guess.

Interestingly enough, last night's Star Trek Voyager episode, called Night, was a mirror image of my boredom. Here's the synopsis:

"The U.S.S. Voyager has entered a desolate region of space with no star systems in sight for two years, and the crew is slowly going crazy. The only activity in this vast expanse is some high levels of theta radiation."
There is one scene where the senior officers are having a briefing to update the Second in command of ship business. Everything is in perfect order. There is nothing new to report. Some crew members are using this opportunity to create new programmes on the holodeck to keep themselves occupied. One member is so affected by the void he has panic attacks. The doctor tells him he's suffering from Nihiliphobia, which is fear of nothingness.

In the meantime, this is the captain's state of mind:

"With nothing to distract her mind from its deepest thoughts, Janeway has retreated to her quarters and is agonizing over her past decisions that brought the crew to the Delta Quadrant. Suddenly, the ship loses power and is left in total darkness."
The crew discover there are intruders on board. The intruders are "night beings" who live in the void. They had been living in peace for years until an alien species called the Malon started poisoning their system. One night being asks Captain Janeway for assistance. This is exactly what the captain was looking for, something, anything, to distract her from her depression.

The crew discover the Malon have been dumping their antimatter waste in the void, which is having a detrimental effect on the void aliens. Janeway offers one Malon technology that will purify their waste which they could recycle. He declines because he believes such a technology will put him out of business. Captain Janeway and her crew decide to close the vortex the Malon ships use to dump their waste. They go into battle with the Malon and succeed. When the Voyager crew come out of the void they are back in normal space with stars and planets.

In a way, the human existence is similar to what the crew on Voyager were going through. I wonder how many of us would appreciate life if everything was perfect? We are always looking for new challenges. We create problems and obstacles so we can find solutions. All this takes time and keeps us occupied.

It seems to me everything is perfect as it is. What we call disasters, pain and suffering is part of what we are all creating. When you get bored of a certain way of life, you change to another. It is always based on personal choice.

Must dash. I have a life to create and live.

Have fun.


Related article: Boring! Give us a Challenge!

Lucid Dreaming - An Alternative View

I used to understand lucid dreaming as when one is aware one is dreaming. I have had those dreams but they are few and far between. Most of the time when I dream, it feels like it is my only reality at the time; I have no awareness of my life in the plane where my body is asleep. There is another way of looking at lucid dreaming.

I have observed lately that in my dreams I am always the same.

In last night's dream I was in a situation where I was being pursued but I wasn't scared because I was aware of myself as Spirit, and that I am always safe in Love. I was extremely calm. I soon woke up out of that dream.

I went back to sleep and in another dream I saw some old friends I haven't seen in years. I spoke to them from the self that I know myself to be now and forever.

It doesn't matter to me whether I am aware I am dreaming or not, it is more important that I am the same no matter what I am dreaming. For me, lucid dreaming is being my real self no matter where I am. When I am my real self, the illusion either dissolves into nothing or it changes into a dream I prefer.

Love always,

How Do I Feel?

I've heard people who appear old, as we collectively define "old", talk about how they feel as if they are 18 (or forever young) inside. I know the feeling.

I wonder what age babies feel inside? If we could understand their language, maybe they'd tell us they feel like their real self that is joy, love and freedom. Is it any wonder many babies are so joyful.

Not only do I feel like my real self that is full of life, joy and love, I am now living as my real self.

The real me feels like a presence yet I don't feel as if I have a form or solid in any way. This is why I now do things without actually feeling the action in a physical sense. For instance, when I walk as my real me, I have no sense of a body but if feels like I'm floating on air; I am weightless. I am a swan gliding on a lake. The moment I walk with an awareness of having a physical body it feels painful.

I've also developed a different typing style now where I'm typing but barely touching the keyboard. It feels so much more relaxing for me.

Does the real self feel the same for everyone? I have no idea. All I know is what the real self feels like for me.

I feel Love.

Friday, October 21, 2005

The Timeless Now

Watching television is like travelling in a time machine, while being aware of all time at the same time.

Take the music channels as an example. There is a music channel to suit every taste: Pop, R&B, Dance, Rock, Indie, Classical etc. There are also channels that show songs from different era. Last night when I heard "All Around the World" by Lisa Stansfield, I remembered how much I loved that song. The feelings came rushing back. I was in a night club bopping away and lost in the music. Then was and is now.

Whatever time you want to experience is happening right now. Who needs a time machine? Just watch television, music videos, films, listen to music, read books, even browse the Web and you'll experience any time now.

Hurray for television!

Enocia in the Timeless Now.

Staying Focused on the Mould

I watched the "Bittersweet Symphony" video again last night by The Verve. It is a brilliant song, a real classic.

In the video, the vocalist (Richard Ashcroft) is walking down a road to destination unknown. He bumps into one woman who falls but he keeps going. In the background you can see others helping the woman up and people looking back at the singer thinking he's crazy. Richard's eyes are focused on where he's going. He bumps into other pedestrians but keeps going. A woman appears and is having a go at him but he's not paying any attention. The woman eventually walks away. Two guys try to distract the singer but he ignores them and keeps walking. Eventually people give way and he's no longer distracted on his walk. The video ends with Richard joined by several guys who walk with him.

Here's part of the lyrics:

'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony this life
Trying to make ends meet, you're a slave to the money then you die
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down
You know the one that takes you to the places where all the veins meet, yeah
No change, I can't change, I can't change, I can't change,
but I'm here in my mold , I am here in my mold
But I'm a million different people from one day to the next
I can't change my mold, no, no, no, no, no Bittersweet Symphony
He is saying that on the one hand there's a part of him that changes as in "I'm a million different people from one day to the next." On the other hand Richard sings "I can't change my mold, no, no, no, no, no." My understanding is that he's referring to the innate self from which these million different people emerge. He can't change who he is as essence. He is always the same.

Now let me revisit the video. In the video Richard doesn't stop to sympathise with people he's bumped into, he simply keeps moving. This suggests that the singer is so focused on his mold that nothing distracts him from who he is being. His determination and focus attracts like-minded people who follow him, presumably wanting to live their lives in the same way.

I can so relate to what it takes to focus on who you are. No matter what the world throws at me to distract me, I am focused on being who I am. Sometimes distractions come as well-meaning ideas from those who want you to see life the way everyone else does; they are there to remind you that "you're only human." Their ideas fall off me like dead leaves. I find that my one-pointed focus dissolves distractions before they arise. People start to admire you for who you are and even want to be like you. Of course no one can be like me; everyone has to be who they are.

Excellent video and song from The Verve. Highly recommended.

Thank you.

With love,

The Verve - Bittersweet Symphony video
Thursday, October 20, 2005

For Trekkies

In the last two days I've watched one of my favourite episodes of Star Trek Voyager called Demon, four times. It's the one where the ship is running low on deuterium, the ship's fuel. They discover ample supply on a demon planet that is considered too toxic for humans. Harry and Paris travel to the planet to get some fuel.

I nominate this episode as the funniest Voyager episode ever; and believe me, I've seen them all. It is filled with gag after gag. Maybe one day I'll write about it.

Live long and prosper.


On Dying

Every experience I have whether it is personal or shared is always connected to the bigger picture of who I am.

I knew that when my mother was planning to go away on holidays, it was also connected with my destiny of being. What is good for one is always good for another. There is only One. I now realise that the Universal "I" has giving me this space to die. By dying, I don't mean in the sense that we understand death where the physical body disintegrates, it is dying to a physical sense of the world.

When I came out this morning I felt like I was a new me, that I was walking without feeling my body. I've had this experience lots of times before but I've always slipped back into the physical sense of being. It feels to me that I've reached a point when the Spiritual sense of reality has taken over. Enough game playing. It's time to be Spirit 100%.

I feel very much excited and curious to experience life as Being.

Yahoo!! Dying feels great!

With love,

Curiouser and Curiouser

Another revelation.

When I'm posting on blogger, I find that when I click hard on the Publish Post icon, the post either gets stuck or there is an error message. But when I think of publishing it then lightly click on the Publish Post icon, it does it quickly.

There is no matter or force here. All is pure Spirit.

It's so exciting; I am living in a spiritual dimension.

Love and Light,

Art Imitating Life; Walking Dead

A few days ago I saw some Christians at a local town centre preaching the Gospel. I was dying to use the toilet at the time so I went into the shopping centre. One woman stopped me and offered me their literature. I declined. She said I looked like someone at death's door and that I needed someone to pray for me. That stopped me in my tracks. I told her she knew nothing of the Truth and if she did she wouldn't speak of death. I was fuming. I went into the shopping centre and was distracted by a photographer who wanted to take my picture, which I've written about in a previous article. I decided that when I was finished I was going to challenge the Christian woman about her method of converting people to Christianity. She was still standing outside speaking to another man. I interrupted their conversation. I asked the woman whether she was aware of "sowing and reaping" as taught in the Bible. She said she was and apologised for what she'd said earlier. She said she'd repented. She asked me whether I wanted her and the man (the pastor) to pray for me. I declined. They insisted that Jesus was Lord and Saviour and I should consider giving my life to Jesus. I told them I was perfectly safe in God's love and God is always looking after me. The woman apologised again and we hugged and that was that.

I've been lying low for a few days. I felt I needed space to just be. The odd thing is I've been feeling weaker and weaker which I attributed to having a period. A while back I thought my period had stopped and then it started and I've just accepted that it will stop when it stops. One thing I've noticed is how my inner state affects the flow. When I'm still, the flow is also still and gives me a sense that it has stopped. The moment I'm focused on everyday stuff, or when I'm asleep, the flow is back to normal.

Anyway yesterday I decided to hoover (vacuum clean) the house before going out. I felt dog-tired. Another thing I've noticed is that when I do anything in a physical way I feel exhausted. For instance, just cleaning the bathroom mirror using elbow grease leaves me exhausted. I find I have to clean by barely making contact; I let my intention do the work. Even as I'm typing this piece, I'm just letting my fingers do the typing without effort; I can barely feel the keyboard. It feels like empty space is writing this article. The moment my fingers feel physical and I'm bashing away at the keyboard, I feel pain.

Even though I'd hoovered in the most non-physical way possible, I still felt exhausted. I lay on the couch trying to recuperate. What's wrong with me? I feel as if I've lifted a ton. I reminded myself that I am inexhaustible Energy, therefore I am never tired. I got up to get ready but I felt dizzy and weak and lay on the couch. I was also in a lot of pain. Is it possible that Christian woman had been right about me after all? Am I "dying?" I was shivering and felt nauseous. This was no ordinary period pain, it felt like my life force was being drained out of me. I was aware of being two people, the physical self racked in pain and the other me who is unaffected. I prayed for help and guidance and heard the words: "We are One." I wrapped myself in my duvet and put the television on to the God Channel, hoping that would help me snap out of it. The man on the channel was speaking about people who refused to make Jesus Lord of their life and how sickness is an indication of one's rebellion. That's all I need! After this programme another teacher spoke about people not committing to God and only calling on God when there is a need.

I've had enough of this, time for someone I can really relate to. I turned the channel to
Ally McBeal, about the mad psychotic lawyer. I felt a lot better. After Ally McBeal, I watched an episode of Star Trek Voyager called One. I found I could really relate to this episode.

The Voyager crew are lost in the Delta Quadrant and have been trying to return home. In this episode they discover a nebula system that could cut down their journey time. While trying to go through the nebula, the crew suddenly fall ill and suffer from headaches, burns, and dizziness; one crew actually dies. The cause is radiation from the nebula. Only the holographic doctor and Seven of Nine, who is half human and half
Borg, are unaffected. The captain has to make a decision to either take the ship through the nebula in one month, and risk death; or take a whole year to go round the nebula. The doctor suggests that the crew is put in stasis for a month, while Seven of Nine and the doctor take care of the ship.

As a Borg, Seven of Nine was part of a collective where everyone shared the one mind and one intent. She's been finding it difficult being an individual. The captain reminds Seven of Nine that she might find it tough being alone, but Seven insists she will adapt.

Soon the crew are in stasis. Seven of Nine is trying hard to cope with being alone with the doctor. She is getting more and more irritable. The doctor's mobile emitter, a device which enables him to move about, is soon affected by the radiation and he is confined to sickbay. Seven of Nine has to take care of the entire ship on her own; she is now truly alone. She soon starts hallucinating without realising she is. In one hallucination, she encounters a Borg drone who tells her she's now weak and imperfect as an individual, and that she doesn't belong in the ship. At one point the doctor asks her whether she is afraid and she replies, "I am Borg." The doctor helps Seven of Nine see that she has been hallucinating and that she should focus on her duties as the crew is depending on her. The ship goes through the nebula and everyone is fine. Seven of Nine learns that she doesn't like being alone.

What occurred to me about this episode was how similar I am to Seven of Nine. Seven of Nine is not quite Borg, nor is she fully human but she's being socialised to be a human. I know that I am Spirit. I am experiencing the world as both spirit and human, but I am being socialised as Spirit. This is why when I experience myself as physical, I feel pain. As a human, everything has a cause whether it is a material, thoughts or emotions. There is no cause in Spirit; or rather, Spirit is the only Cause which is Love. When I saw the pain as having a cause (as in period) I was seeing myself as human which made me weak. It was only when I reminded myself of who I am, that I am Spirit, therefore, the pain has no cause because there is no pain in Spirit, did I feel better. So I need to be always focused on the truth of who I am. Unlike Seven of Nine, I am perfectly fine with being alone; I know that wherever I am, I am all One.

Was the Christian woman right about me? Yes and no. Yes she may have seen a "death" which is me dying to a physical sense of the world. Maybe I am a walking dead! Isn't that cool? But as Spirit, I am deathless, beginningless and endless.

All is Spirit.
I am Spirit.


Related poem: To Be Alone
Monday, October 17, 2005

A Jolly Ride

Earlier today I accompanied my mother to Gatwick airport. She's off on her hols. We caught the train from Victoria. Yippee, a train ride for a change. My mother asked me whether we'd caught the right train as in the Gatwick Express, as opposed to the slower train. Just as the train was leaving, the announcement came on the tannoy welcoming passengers onboard, spoken in English, French, German, Spanish and Italian. "Yes mum, we are on the right train. I can't imagine them speaking to passengers in five languages on the other trains." A fellow passenger joined in the conversation. She said people would find it very odd hearing train announcements in five languages.

OK in London we're used to hearing different languages but to hear this on normal trains would be taking the biscuit. Can you imagine people's reactions?

Passenger A: "These bloody foreigners have come to our country and taken our jobs and houses, now they expect us to speak their languages."

Passenger B: "I only want to get to Brighton, mate."

Hahaha. OK, my imagination was running away with me as I was probably bored.

A while back I caught a train to go down South from Waterloo station. While I waited to buy my ticket, I thought it was very strange so many French people were travelling down South. I finally twigged I was at the International section queuing up with passengers going on Eurostar to the Continent. No wonder! Hehehe!

On the train to Gatwick I saw this girl listening to her stereo, Ipod or whatever they're called these days. She was belting out a song. To the trained, self-conscious, adult ear, the girl was tone deaf, but that didn't stop her singing. That's the thing about being a child; you sing to express yourself not because you are talented. At least it made the journey entertaining.

You've gotta have a laugh.

Have a good day.


Dancing Queen

On my way back home after browsing at a bookshop yesterday, I had to make an important decision. Do I turn right and walk to catch my bus, or turn left and catch another bus. I fancied walking left for a change and walk a mile or so and then catch my bus. Then I thought, sod it, I'll catch the first bus that comes along. At Trafalgar Square there was a huge crowd listening to some women singing "Dancing Queen" by Abba. Was it an Abba reunion? I had to get off the bus. I crossed over and entered the square.

How odd? There were thousands of Asian people (of Indian origin) in the square. Is it the Asian Abba fan club? What's going on? I heard someone wishing someone Happy Diwali. Oh I now I get it, it's the religious festival, Diwali, being celebrated not an Abba reunion. After the Abba song the next performance were some dancers; and no, they weren't dancing to an Abba song. I was slightly disappointed it wasn't an Abba concert until I was handed a goodie bag of Indian sweets, which were so yummy.

Funnily enough, my friend in India wanted to send me some sweets. See, V, I have received your sweets after all. Thank you.

And just for you, here are the lyrics to Dancing Queen.

You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen

Friday night and the lights are low
Looking out for the place to go
Where they play the right music, getting in the swing
You come in to look for a king
Anybody could be that guy
Night is young and the music’s high
With a bit of rock music, everything is fine
You’re in the mood for a dance
And when you get the chance...

You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen

You’re a teaser, you turn ’em on
Leave them burning and then you’re gone
Looking out for another, anyone will do
You’re in the mood for a dance
And when you get the chance...

You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen
Happy Diwali, dear friends!

Lots of love,
Sunday, October 16, 2005

It's a Done Deal; Just Say Yes

Aren't we, humans, clever making up rules as we go along? You can't just receive all good, you have to make sure that what you are asking to receive is also for the good of everyone, or you won't receive it. This is part of the human guilt-trip; I'm afraid to have fun in case someone else isn't. As there is only the One Infinite Intelligence and Love in all, can the One be infinite love in you while being infinite misery in another? Of course not. Of course if you believe in different powers then it is understandable that one power would want joy for one and ignoring another's needs. I believe in the One Power, Intelligence, Love, and Wisdom in all.

Because I understand there is only the One in All who wants the best for all concerned, I don't have to think about how the process works, nor do I have to consciously ask for the One's will to be done. All I have to do is receive what is present.

Instead of focusing on the way Infinite Intelligence gives to all, we have got busy creating our own system of exchange: I give to you, you give me something in exchange. As no one knows exactly what an exchange is worth, we are playing guessing games, which is never consistent. There is even a belief that what you give to another is multiplied hundredfold (or whatever amount). This is a human construct, of course, and has nothing to do with Infinite Intelligence. Why would the Infinite impose a limit as to how much He can give?

There is no such thing as exchange in Infinite Intelligence. There is only the one Intelligence in all who always wants the best for everyone. He wants you to always be in health, be joyful, at peace, happy, successful and have whatever brings you joy.

Another way we distract ourselves from reality is the way we try to bargain with Infinite Intelligence. I'll do my part trying to understand truth and you do yours. If I tithe to you, I expect something in return.

Trying hard to get what I deserve in exchange for all my good work is meaningless. I know there is only One Infinite Intelligence in all that is infinite health, love, peace, joy, wisdom, and all good. I do not think about what I need to have done in preparation. I don't put any limits as to how much I should receive. I don't think about my poor suffering brothers and sisters who I should also pray for to receive. I know it is a done deal, that the Infinite Intelligence works for the good of all. All I have to do is receive all Good forever more.

Two weeks ago I met a friend I'd thought of the day before. She invited me to her calligraphy exhibition. On the brochure she gave me, I noticed a photographic exhibition about 1000 faces of people who work, live and visit the local town. A few days later while I was in the town's shopping centre, I saw some photographs being displayed for the same exhibition. I thought they were brilliant and stopped to admire the participants' faces.

A few days ago I said to a friend, I correspond with by email, that I would love to send him a picture but I don't usually take photographs. I said when I have one taken, I'll send him a copy.

Yesterday while I was in the same town, I went into the shopping centre to use their toilets. I noticed the photographs were still on display. A man approached me. He said I had striking features and he wanted to take my picture. He turned out to be the man behind the exhibition. He said he'd taken over 500 pictures and was still looking for more faces. After humming and ha-ing, I agreed to be part of the exhibition. He took about 15 shots and together we decided which one he should use. It came out really well. I can't wait to see my picture in full size, plus I'll have a nice professional picture I could send my friend.

By agreeing to participate in the photographer's exhibition, I was giving to myself by having a beautiful professional photograph; I was giving to the photographer to help fulfil his dream; and I was giving to the local residents and many others who are going to enjoy the exhibition. This is Infinite Intelligence in action; give to one and everyone benefits.

There is nothing I have to do in exchange for the Infinite Good that already exists. All I have to do is say "Yes!"


Saturday, October 15, 2005

If What You're Doing isn't Working

If what you're doing isn't working, force it, manipulate people and make it happen.

If what you're doing isn't working, plead, beg, bargain and hopefully things will change.

If what you're doing isn't working, it's because you believe you don't deserve it.

If what you're doing isn't working, it is your karma.

If what you're doing isn't working, give it up.

If what you're doing isn't working, admit it, you are a failure.

If what you're doing isn't working, weep, mope, feel sorry for yourself.

If what you're doing isn't working, blame someone.

If what you're doing isn't working, get angry.

If what you're doing isn't working, who gives a shit?

If what you're doing isn't working, there's a lesson God wants you to learn.

If what you're doing isn't working, God has another plan for your life.

If what you're doing isn't working, what you're doing is not working.

If what you're doing isn't working, do something else.

If what you're doing isn't working, ask for assistance.

If what you're doing isn't working, why are you doing anyway? Just be your real self and let it happen.

If what you're doing isn't you're being ridiculous!

It takes all sorts to make things work.


I Would Rather Be Grateful, Thank You!

Recently for three days in a row, the Internet was down at the library where I usually post my work. The library staff said we should all complain. I said it was not my style to complain, which I believe negates the excellent service I always receive. The library staff insisted that they are supposed to provide efficient service all the time. They believed their IT department was not going to take the problems seriously unless more people complained. Someone shoved a complaint form in my hands. I took it with me and dumped it in the bin.

I have noticed companies have "suggestions" boxes and complaints forms, but I've never seen an appreciation box. I wonder why?

We seem to live in a whining society where it is believed complaining will get you the desired results. I don't believe in complaining. When I complain I'm focusing my attention on faults which manifests more of the same. Let's say I bought something that was faulty, I'll simply return it and either ask for my money back or exchange it for another product.

People perform better when they are appreciated. Focus on someone's "bad" behaviour and that's all you'll see, which doesn't give the other person room to be more. If you have nothing good to say about someone, focus on someone you have something good to say about; or say nothing.

But how is society going to improve if you don't complain or make suggestions? I know from experience that what I put my attention on is magnified. I would rather give my attention to all the good work and excellent service I receive; I also know that everyone is always doing the best they can based on beliefs and environment.

Take what is happening globally such as natural disasters, wars and attacks. Governments, religions, scientists, and the media spend so much energy focused on the worst and when it happens, governments says "We were right to warn our nationals about an attack, see it has happened!" Religion responds "We knew this would happen; it is that prophecy come true!" Scientists say "It is just as we predicted; we were right!" As for the media, well disasters are their bread and butter anyway. Of course they are all right. If you focus your energy on the worst, it happens.

Everyone has the right to complain. I would rather be grateful for all the good I am receiving, thank you very much.

With love,
Friday, October 14, 2005

Plug In - 2

Thoughts create static, a temporary disconnection from the Energy of One.

When I am plugged into the Universe, I am pure Energy. You know something, my walk is different. I am gliding and each movement is a joy; gaiety in action. I am a squirrel that hops about with hardly a sound. You only know a squirrel is about when you hear a crackle or two.

I am stillness in motion; weightlessness, playfulness, lithesome, freedom.

The world stretches around me.
Maybe it is I stretching around the world.
No difference.

Plugging in is simply acknowledging that I am Energy, I am Love, I am Substance, I am Infinite Intelligence.

Oh what it is to be plugged in all the time, forever and ever and ever.

Oh what it is to be in joy for ever and ever and ever.

Off to reconnect in silence.

Plugging in.


EnOcia = I C A One

Related articles: Plug In; Staying Connected to the Grid and Being the Grid

Plug In

When you plug into electricity, there is a continuous flow of electricity. Just because a light bulb doesn't work doesn't mean there's no electricity flowing. Just remove the bulb and touch the base and you'll soon find out. The only time an electricity stops flowing is when you've switched it off or it's been disconnected from the main energy grid.

What is my point?

There is an Energy grid that I can plug into at any time. This is my essence. It doesn't matter what my beliefs are, what I think I know, what my actions have been in the past, what my future plans are, my successes or failures; I can plug in now and enjoy my essence.

Yesterday I had some sharp pain in my back. I didn't care what the cause was. I thought to myself "I am plugged in" and imagined my hands like a plug connecting into the Grid. Just like one has access to the entire energy grid when one is plugged into electricity, I knew I also had access to Infinite Energy. I didn't have to think about how I was going to be made whole I just knew I was connected. The pain stopped. I was back to being my real self.

This Energy grid is available here and now. What stops me from connecting to it at all time? There's the habit of thinking I need to understand truth to demonstrate it. None of that matters. This Energy grid is my true wealth.

I am plugged in.



Related articles: Plug In - 2; Staying Connected to the Grid and Being the Grid

The Best I Can Offer is To Be Myself

I know what it feels like when you so want the best for someone. I mean, surely it must be good if you want someone to be well. I have had that intention for my mother. Over the years as I studied different healing techniques, I've tried to help her get well. Sometimes the technique worked for a short while then it was back to square one. The problem is I expect fast results; my mother believes things takes time, though she is open to miracles. (She has experienced being healed of a sprain in less than one minute). She has witnessed me being healed of all sorts without medication, so she knows this is possible. The best I can do for her is to let go of all expectations of her and let her be. I trust that she already has all the resources she needs.

Yesterday when I went home I asked my mother how her day was. She's about to go on holidays and she's been doing last minute shopping. She said while she was on her way out she was in so much pain she couldn't move her leg so she had to come back home. While she was resting, she had a visit from two friends. Her two friends, who are also Christians, prayed for her and she felt a lot better. She even went out shopping later. You see my mother has her beliefs and she prefers to follow what she believes to be true and I respect her for it.

The best way I can help anyone is to be myself. When I share my experiences on the Internet, I am sharing a perspective of what is possible. I have no expectations how this information is used. No doubt many will find what I write inspirational. Let me put it another way. Before Roger Bannister broke the 4 minute mile, people didn't think it was possible. Many new world records have been created and broken because of Bannister.

This morning while I was getting dressed I couldn't decide whether to take a long coat or my fleece jacket. I asked my mother what the weather forecast was supposed to be.

She said, "I don't know. What difference does it make to you anyway?"
"See mum," I said laughing, "you're learning."

My mother and I have had discussions about how I can be wearing a cardigan when everyone is complaining of heat. She reckons I live in my own world. My mother's comments is an indication that through our interactions she has observed another possibility of what is.

I met a baby recently who I thought was really cute. I told mum it was a pity the baby was so young. Mum said that in 18 years' time we might meet up again and the young man will not know I am old enough to be his grandmother because I'll still look the same. This shows that my mother now accepts that eternal youth is a possibility because she has observed that reality in me.

There really is no point rushing around trying to change someone or impose my view of reality on anyone; nor would I like someone trying to change me. All I have to offer is to be the best I know how to be and share my experiences. I then leave it to people to do with the information as they see fit.

Everyone has all the resources they'll ever need.


Related article: Knowledge and Freedom

Following My Own Rhythm

The name of this blog is Infinite Life, Infinite Joy. It is about how I am being true to myself, and what makes life more meaningful for me. I cannot be true to myself if I'm not following my own life rhythm.

Over the years, I have been gradually slowing down to my own pace. Even when I worked in an office I stopped rushing around and did thing in my own time. Now I work in my own time. Another way I've slowed down is travelling by bus, which has given me a different perspective of life. Indeed, many of my realisations have occurred during my travels by bus. I also haven't worn a watch in a while. The irony is I'm still very much aware of time but I am not ruled by time. When I post these articles, I use public places such as the library and Internet cafes that are very time-oriented. Yet, I have learned how to use time to my advantage. It just shows that it's not about how much time one has but what one's intention is.

Yesterday I came across a book called In Praise of Slowness by Carl Honore. I decided to speed-read through it. Haha.

In Honore's intelligent and very well-researched book, he discusses how slowness is changing the way many people live their lives. He examines various aspects of every day living such as nutrition, work, leisure, exercise, sex, and the way we think. For instance many people are discovering that Yoga connects them to the stillness within; and when one is still one is more creative and of course peaceful. Honore is not saying everyone should think and act slowly, but for us to connect to our innate rhythm so each of us can achieve whatever we need to in our own time.

Let's say the slow movement reached a critical mass, how much would this change or influence society? That rather depends. Honore talks about doctors, for instance, having more time with their patients. This implies that while people might be less stressed, the fact that you need to see a doctor suggests there is still the belief in sickness. In pre-industrial society, life was slow but people still got sick and died. In my view, the cult of slowness might slow down aging and cut down on sickness but it will not wipe out the belief in aging and sickness. But the cult of slowness is a wonderful idea. I'm glad this book has been written.

While I was speed-reading in the bookshop the most amazing thing happened. I stopped to listen to this particular music the shop was playing. The tempo was very fast in comparison to the topic of the book I was reading. Then the tempo of the same music changed and it slowed down considerably. This made me laugh out loud, at least in silence. Talk about the music reflecting my inner state of slowness!

In the meantime, there was an announcement in the shop that the superstar author, Jackie Collins, was coming to the bookshop for some signings. There I was reading about slowness while all around me were people rushing about trying to get seats for the event. When Jackie arrived there was a flurry of flashing paparazzi. I heard Jackie reading from her latest book. As I've read a few of her novels, I abandoned the book of slowness in favour of a bit of raunch. Jackie answered some questions from the audience about her books, and about life in Hollywood. It was interesting to experience two realities at the same time: the world of a superstar that is all go, and my own time.

Infinite life is about staying connected to my own natural rhythm while still having fun with other realities.

Peace and Love,
Thursday, October 13, 2005

The Creator, Sustainer and Destroyer

In the Hindu religious beliefs, God is perceived as taking forms as the Creator (Brahma), the Sustainer (Vishnu) and the Destroyer (Shiva).

We see these three "aspects" of God depicted in the Old Testament in the Bible of a God who creates, sustains and destroys.

I've often wondered why a God who has created would want to destroy. But now that I am working with Energy on a conscious basis, I realise that it is one's intention that is the creator, sustainer and destroyer.

All things exist in a state of formlessness as pure Energy. This Energy is infinite intelligence and Good. When I wish to have an experience, my intention activates the energy which creates, i.e. brings into manifestation what I have intended. While I am still interested in the creation, my attention sustains the creation. When I have had enough of the creation, I withdraw my attention and this creation is destroyed. By destruction, I mean the form is dissolved and returns to the formless state.

Let's say it is a particular belief I'm interested in. My intention/belief attracts me to an appropriate group which I join. While I still have the belief, my attention sustains my attraction to the group. When I no longer have the belief, I withdraw my attention by mentally and physical withdrawing from the group. When I withdraw my attention the group becomes formless for me, as in it no longer has any appeal. It doesn't mean the group is destroyed as in wiped off the face of the earth. Others who are still interested in the belief of the group will continue to be attracted to that group.

Years ago, I met this guy in a seminar I was instantly attracted to in a romantic sense. I could sense the feeling was mutual. We had a lot in common and enjoyed each other's company. I thought about him a lot and imagined us having a relationship. Then I realised I didn't want to get into a relationship after all. There was stuff I was interested in and I didn't want any distractions. So I decided to consciously "destroy" what I had created. How? I dissolved the thought-form of us liking each other, which we were both sustaining with our thoughts. It happened instantly. One minute I was having fantasies about this guy, then I dissolved the thoughts, and the next I felt nothing. I still loved him, but I was no longer in love with him.

The next time I met him at another seminar, at first he avoided me. When I finally got to speak to him, he said he was now focused on whatever he was doing and he didn't want to be distracted. Haha! That's a good one. At least we were both in agreement.

I recently had a crush on someone I know and we've been chatting over the Internet. I even told him I had a crush. I found myself thinking about him a lot and imagining having a relationship with him. It was fun to have the feeling but I knew it wasn't going to happen. I have now dissolved that thought-form. I love him as a friend but the romantic feelings are gone.

Intention can be used to create, sustain, and destroy in all aspects of one's life. You have an addiction to someone or a thing, put out the intention of wanting to be released and let Divine Energy release you from the experience by destroying it. You can also consciously destroy the creation if you know how to work with Energy.

Let me reiterate that to destroy is to simply dissolve one's creation into the formless state, where it no longer has any meaning for you.

The possibilities of Energy and intentions are endless.

My intention is the Creator, Sustainer and Destroyer of my experiences, which always works for good.

Best wishes.


It's All Happening

One thing I know is that what we experience as forms is only an infinitesimal part of the unmanifest, which exists as pure Energy.

This means there is no need to draw on previous experiences or reinterpret the past when one can draw from the Infinite Energy now.

There is also no need to depend on one's understanding and realisation; one can tap into the Infinite now.

Think about how all those resources just waiting for us to tap into now.

Of course if one chooses to rely on previous experiences, the known, it is also one's choice.

It's all happening.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Knowledge and Freedom

A dominant paradigm most people share is that of correction. Correction is based on the premise that we are imperfect and don't know all there is. We, therefore, expect to be corrected. If you expect to be corrected, you have experiences about correction. Thus, you attract experiences where you are either doing the correcting or someone else is correcting you.

One day you realise that correction is a belief. You realise that you do know all; your nature is omniscience. You soon eavesdrop two boys arguing over the solution to 12 x 12. One boy says the answer is 144 while the other is adamant the answer is 114. You know the answer is 144. You find yourself in a dilemma. If you confirm one boy is right, you have corrected the other, and you're back in the reality of correction and not knowing. What do you do? Well, you've got to stick to what you know is true for you, that you are omniscience. Every body already knows; they are simply playing a game of not-knowing and needing correction. You decide not to get involved.

Surely, it is your responsibility to pass on what you know? What is the use of knowledge if it is not shared? This is a tricky one.

I believe knowledge is to be shared but one's intention determines whether someone is stuck in a reality of correction and needing correction, as opposed to being free. How do you share knowledge? If you are moved to give, you give without expectations. This means you don't care how the information is used. Second, you know that everybody already knows all, therefore, what you give is only another perspective, not meant to instruct. The Internet is an excellent medium where one can post ideas without expectations.

When you give out knowledge with expectations, you are of course coming from the premise that others don't know and it is your responsibility to teach them. You are expecting the ones "receiving" to have the right understanding and to apply that understanding in a way you believe it should be applied. When they don't you feel as if you haven't succeeded in your purpose. You spend time trying to correct others until you feel people have been enlightened. As for how long this could take? As we say in the UK, "How long is a piece of string?" Let's just say, we're talking lifetimes.

Knowledge is freedom when given without expectations, otherwise it is bondage for the one giving and the one receiving.

All is well.


Handle With Care

I've never had a baby but I have handled a few. I've also met loads on my travels.

I have been very careful how I carry babies as they seem so fragile, though I know babies are very strong. Yeah, they are so flexible, their joints are so supple, considering they don't even practise Yoga.

My point is we are still very careful the way we handle babies, aren't we? We are gentle with their soft skin. They have even developed special lotions and creams for babies to keep their skin soft, or so the products claim. I wonder if that's why I use baby lotion on my skin? Nah! I'm way too intelligent to buy into advertising.

Before you can say waah, baby is now a big baby, as in an adult, and now we need special products for adult skin, which keeps them soft, smooth and younger looking. (I must stop watching those adverts). Hey, what happened to the gentle hugs and kisses that are portrayed on commercials for baby products? I deserve to be petted too.

Handling babies with care, and wanting to make sure they are well taken care of, is a reminder of my real Self's true nature. My nature is tenderness, sweetness and light. I have not been designed to rush about like a headless chicken. Speed is not normal.

I consider myself to be very relaxed and peaceful. I can be in a noisy room and I am not bothered. I can fall asleep with music blaring and it wouldn't bother me. And yet I feel as if my body is not totally aligned with my peaceful nature. I still feel, as I write this, that there are two versions of me: the me whose body is trying to keep up with modern society; and the me that is chilling out. I know there is only one me of course, but how come it doesn't always feel that way?

Another way to describe it is observing the changes in the seasons. I know that the real Energy that is the substance of all is unchanging, therefore, we shouldn't be experiencing change in seasons. However, there is another consciousness that is the exact opposite which is in constant flux; it is the consciousness that makes people get sick, grow old and die. Thus, the world we experience is a "negative" print version of the vibrant real world. Knowing and being aware of what is real is one thing; living as the real is another.

Last night as I walked to catch my bus, I was aware of having my being in Source Energy that is unchanging. I could feel my breathing slowing down and I wasn't breathing. There was also the "counterfeit" consciousness vying for attention. I felt pressure around me, saw commuters rushing around, while I sauntered to the bus station. As I was waiting for the bus to arrive, I saw the world as continuous waves of energy moving about while I focused on my connection as the Soul of the Universe that is completely still.

This stillness is my natural rhythm. Being at my real rhythm doesn't mean things don't get done. As a matter of fact, I get more done because I have all the time in the world.

Even as I type this I am aware that I have slowed down considerably and yet I am also conscious of how connected I am with everything in the here and now. There's no rush; there is never a need to rush. All is well.

I am a newborn baby, all sweetness and light. Please handle with care. Why? Because I'm worth it.


Related article: Gently Does It
Tuesday, October 11, 2005

I Have All the Time in the World

What is the difference between moving at infinite speed and staying still? difference.


Because there is no difference.


OK. Say, you're moving from London to New York and back again to London at infinite speed. You are moving so fast an observer wouldn't notice you've been to New York and back again. The observer will think you haven't moved from the spot, which is the same as standing still.

On my walk just now I realised I was walking very fast so I slowed down; or rather, I let Intelligence move my body. When it came to crossing the road, I felt the old "flight" urge but I let the body move and I found I had lots of time to cross the road. It was as if the approaching traffic came to a standstill and let me cross over in my own time.

My body has got so used to the rush, rush, rush of modern living which is a constant awareness of time. As I type this I am aware of letting my fingers type without needing to speed up. Part of me wants to make things happen really fast because "time is money" but I'm letting things happen.

I'm now aligning my body to my real rhythm which is stillness.

In stillness, I am Master of time: "For the Son of man is Lord even of the sabbath day." (Matthew 12: 8)

In stillness I have all the time in the world.

Lots of love,

Without Love, It is Nothing

I believe one of the greatest writings about Love was by St Paul in 1 Corinthians 13 (in this version love is called "charity." Paul says that you could have all power to do great works but without love, it is nothing. I believe this power is thought power. So many people are becoming aware of the power of thoughts and intentions. Without love, thoughts are just random expressions that people pick up on, give it energy and pass it on, and so it continues. Nuff said about that.

For me it is important for me to be impeccable, as in always aware that I am rooted in Infinite Intelligence aka Divine Love, which is Good. The One that is Good cannot harm itself. So yes I use thoughts, right now I am using thoughts, but I know the thoughts are Love being expressed. I know that my intention is Love. And I know that the same Love that is in me is the same Love in all.

Love is everywhere present.

All is well.


Gently Does It

While I was brushing my teeth this morning I was conscious how much unnecessary force I was applying. Since Love is everywhere present, there is no need for me to force anything, just let it happen. My breathing slowed down to an absolute stand-still, and the brush did a waltz around my teeth and gums; what grace!

As I applied my make-up I was aware how hard my finger tips were rubbing against my skin. Gosh! What ever happened to the gentle approach? Maybe I think that if I apply the makeup gently it won't go on. I changed my approach and just let it flow. My finger tips felt like a gentle breeze against my skin. Hmmm! Lovely!

On my walk to the bus stop I was aware how much force I was using to walk. Here we go again! So I let Love walk me. It was such a gentle movement, as if I was floating in space.

And here I am sitting in front of a computer screen bashing away and my arms are hurting. I'm now letting the Intelligence move my fingers effortlessly. I am totally relaxed.

Gently does it! All is well.


Cor Blimey, Guv'nor!

I had one of those days yesterday.

I went to my local library to post some work I had on disc on to my blog. The library assistant scanned the disc for virus and said while no virus was detected, an error message had come up. When I tried to open the disc, it wouldn't open. The library assistant said I didn't have a hope in hell of opening the disc as there was obviously an error. I begged to differ. So I asked Infinite Intelligence to open the disc for me. I reminded the One that I needed to post my work on the blog. Three of the files I had been working on opened, while one opened only part of the text and said the rest of it had errors. The interesting thing is that I had written something about "error" on that same piece. It would seem the file had taken the text literally and converted it to "error." Blimey! I decided not to use that version and re-wrote the piece.

I had also been thinking about a website about positive intentions which a friend had told me about, but I hadn't kept the information. I did a search on Google. In the meantime I opened another browser and sent my friend an email asking for the link. When I got back into Google, I saw the computer/Intelligence had automatically opened up the website for me. I sent another email to my friend asking her to confirm whether the web page Infinite Intelligence had opened for me was the correct one. Hahaha. The One who Knows All had opened up a web page I wanted and here I am asking for confirmation. Oh ye of little faith! Hahaha. It was the right website of course.

Later on a bus I noticed this beauty salon. Years ago, I went there to have my nails manicured. I had been very paranoid about my nails because I thought they didn't looked normal. The therapist admired my nails, particularly the white tips. She said people came to the salon to have French manicures and I already have natural French manicure.

I intended to get off the bus to run an errand but I had a feeling I should stay on the bus and get off a mile or so down to catch another bus into the west end. This is exactly what I did. As I waited for my next connection, a woman alighted from another bus and said hello. I thought she looked familiar but I couldn't quite place where I had met her. She said, "You don't remember me, do you? We met on a bus, remember?" It was then I remembered. I told her it was good to see her and she was off.

On the bus journey where we met, there I was lost in thought when a young lady beside me said, "Excuse me? I just want to say how beautiful your nails are." That was how our conversation had started. Isn't it amazing that she should pop up now?

I'm wondering, had I sensed I was going to meet this young lady again which got me thinking about my nails and that beauty salon? Or was it my thoughts about my nails that made me continue that journey till I met that young lady. Hmmm! Which came first - the finger or the nail? Hahaha.

When I went home I shared some spider jokes I'd made up with my mother. We had a giggle. When I went to have a bath I saw a baby spider in the sink. After I'd finished having a birth there was another spider. I told my mother that we should stop thinking about the creatures as they were interpreting my thoughts about them as a call for love.

Speaking of which, I'd better end with a disclaimer.

"Any mention of the eight-legged insects which shall remain nameless is incidental and should not be taken as an indication that I am calling out to them. Go spin your webs elsewhere. And all words I have used in this piece are but symbols only and not to be taken literally."
That's all folks.

Lots of love,
Monday, October 10, 2005

I’ll Be There No Matter What

A while back I was really getting stressed about something. The content doesn’t matter now but I was panicking about the next day, which was very unlike me. I had this strong desire to watch aeroplanes land and take off. I went on a ride (several bus rides) to Heathrow airport. I went into the visitor’s gallery and watched planes land and take off. I also amused myself listeing to plane-spotters getting excited about various models. Suddenly a song I’ve never heard before or since came on the radio. The chorus said:

"No matter what tomorrow brings
I’ll be there,
I’ll be there."
I knew it was a message for me to trust in what is. The next day and the days after, everything went well. It was literally out of my hands.

Who is the one that is always there? Infinite Intelligence also called Divine Love. Wherever I am, this Intelligence is always there. When I think of tomorrow, the Intelligence is already there. When I think of a month’s time, the Intelligence is also there. No matter what time and place I project to, the Intelligence is already there. This Intelligence has infinite resources. This Intelligence can create any reality, all I have to do is trust in It. So instead of panicking about what is going to happen, or having regrets over what might have been, all I have to do is remember that Infinite Intelligence is in all time.

Let’s say I’m thinking of meeting someone at a specific date and time. If I think of the person as existing in time and space, I’m bound to expect the person to be on time, early or late. I might worry about getting there on time or that something might happen. Even if I was disciplined enough to only focus on what I would like to happen, I still have to be very careful I don’t have an opposing thought as that might manifest instead.

On the other hand, I could stop thinking of my friend and our arrangements and focus only on the truth that Infinite Intelligence is ever present. Put another way, everything exists within Infinite Intelligence. Thus, no matter what the future brings, no matter what is going on the human level, I know that all is well. Infinite Intelligence has already got it covered.

Why worry when I already know all is well?

Be Happy.

Sunday, October 09, 2005

A New Day, Another New Blog

Yippee! A new blog. Oh joy!

I’m so excited about this new blog. This blog is really about how the Infinite Intelligence/Energy is expressing as me, Enocia. All I need to know is that this Energy is everywhere present and then trust in Her to deliver. No more needing to understand truth in order to demonstrate it. Why bother when you can trust in Infinite Intelligence to do it for you? Who cares how things work?

I’m also going to have fun changing the colours and fonts.

All is well.


Saturday, October 01, 2005

fractal 2