Friday, December 16, 2005

Are You Normal?

My earliest memory is seeing myself sitting on a potty looking down a flight of stairs. Good scenery. I don't remember much about when I was a baby. I can't imagine I spent time pondering on life and the universe. I don't think I thought about anything otherwise I would have remembered.

Then I started thinking or was conditioned into the belief that thinking is the done thing. I became a formative thinker though I tried not to clog up my system; not that I am capable of clogging up my brain as I don't know much.

I've gone as far as I can go on thinking; now I don't think much. In fact, I don't think. When I speak, I don't think about what I am going to say, words just come out of the silence. I don't have to think about what I write, ideas just pop out; and the ideas are always complete. For instance I can look at something and know exactly why I am looking at the thing and how that thought-form relates to who I am. Otherwise, I tend to stay in silence.

Now here's the thing. I believe Man is an idea of Perfection but it is our thoughts that make us dense; then we get stuck in the world of forms. Put another way, thoughts are what keeps me in form; they make me heavy and earthy. When I am not thinking, I become light, like the idea I inherently am. I know that I'm going to get lighter and lighter and will eventually become invisible to the senses, as ideas are.

Last night at a bus stop, this woman came up to me and prodded my back. "Are you normal?" she said. She seemed very angry. I dived into the waiting bus, even though it wasn't the one I wanted.

Hmmm! I wonder if the woman was seeing right through me? Maybe, she thought I was a walking dead. Hehehe. Isn't that ironic?

Well, I am having fun being in the silence.

And just for the record, I am very normal; whatever that is.

Love always,
Enocia